I Need a Hug...or a Major Dosage of Painkillers

I’ve talked abut my illness twice before; here and here. I guess I was kind of vague, partly because I was ashamed with what I had. However, I’ve decided to open up here and tell you more.

I have Bartholin's gland abscess (BGA). I’ve had it three times before, this is my fourth time. I am in pain, tolerable only because of the high dosage of painkillers my doctor prescribed me. The first 2 times I got BGA, I had to go for an operation to drain the fluid out. The third time, I got lucky and the swelling subsided by itself. This time, I’m not so lucky. Most probably tomorrow I’ll have to check in for another operation.

BGA is a women’s thing so you guys out there can relax. Lucky bastards. Don’t have to worry about labor pains; don’t have to worry about your vagina swelling up.

Most women don't even know they have a bartholin's gland, I had never heard of them myself until I googled “vagina infections”. It is a tiny gland inside each of the labia near the opening of the vagina, one gland on each side. They produce fluid that lubricates the vagina. Basically when a woman gets horny, those glands get working. Very important!! There are tiny ducts in the gland and if those get 'clogged' up by skin cells or secretions, it can form a cyst. If the cysts get infected, then they become BGA.

I hate BGA. I hate it with a f**king vengeance. I hate the way it robs me of my ability to function, to walk, sit down, and think. I hate the fact that it makes me scared to go to the toilet. I hate the ever throbbing sensation that starts from my crotch all the way down to the end of my toes. I hate the overwhelming pain.

Why am I talking about my embarrassing illness here? Why publicly on my blog, when I know people who know me will read about it and most probably look at me funny. Because I believe that knowledge is power. I believe women need to know about this. Men too, tell your wives, sisters and girlfriends. Also, this is not a married woman’s illness; I’ve heard that virgins can get BGA too. I wished my doctors had explained to me about BGA before, I would have known what to expect and figured out what to do in order to keep them at bay. If I had known what I know now about BGA, I wouldn’t have felt like a dirty idiot before. I wouldn’t have blamed lack of hygiene or too much sex. I wouldn’t have blamed hubby.

I know now that BGA can’t actively be prevented. According to statistics, about 2% of the female population gets BGA. Of course with my luck, I would be included within that bloody 2%. I read up on other women’s experience with BGA and they scare me. Each and every one talks about the pain over and over again. Trust me, you know how it feels when you get a really bad toothache? Imagine that pain in a very sensitive place and you get the idea.

I’m hoping my opening up would help some person out there who might be going through the same thing. I want you to know that there’s no shame in getting BGA; it’s not your fault. It’s just dumb bad luck.

Pray for me tomorrow.

To know more about Bartholin's gland abscesses, you can google it or click here, here or here for more info.