Thursday, June 16, 2005

Aspire...I think not

We’ve been asked to do our Career Profile for our new CEO coz apparently reading what your employees aspire for the company is much easier than hearing them bullshit it to your face.

In it, there’s a column that asks for our “Personal Aspirations.”

I have no idea what to put there.

5 years at this joint and all my aspirations have been sucked dry. I’m just hanging on the edge of my fingertips for the next 5 years so I can quit without half a million ringgit worth of debts on my head and start up my own business or better yet sit on my fat ass at home and channel surf with the kids.

Side note: My ass is not fat. OK, not THAT fat.

So I’m staring at the computer screen, drumming my fingers at what to type.

What I REALLY want to type is as follows:


1. To compete in the next Miss Universe and win the Miss Congeniality award.
2. To win a million dollars or a new house/car/facial wash.
3. To be able to get over my obsessions with MPVs. Seriously, it’s just killing me right now.
4. To be able to apply make up in 5 minutes flat and have it last all day long. No shiny clown-like noses by lunchtime.
5. To be able to make it through the day without yelling at the kids for being just kids.
6. To travel to Paris and spit from the top of Eiffel Tower.
7. To meet Raul Gonzales in person.
8. To be good at one musical instrument. And the triangle or the bloody cymbals doesn’t count.
9. To travel to a poor 3rd World Country and adopt a child.
10. To be the best daughter, sister, wife and mother I can possibly be.

I wonder...would they give me a raise or fire me if I wrote all that?


azrin said...

#6 !!! =p patutlah selalu basah macam hujan jaa jalan bawa Eiffle Tower tuu!! uuweeerrrkkk!!

Krissy said...

I don't know. I think that you might get points for honesty. Particularly if you add at the end:

11. Subsume all these hopes and aspirations and channel all that energy into trying to help your company so that you make more money than God.

jsdaughter said...

What a funny post!! Thank you for your kind comments on my site..

mumsgather said...

Why don't you try? Hehe.

Anonymous said...

cayala along..
tulih la camtu, nak tengok sikit apa reaksi yr boss :P
anyway, nama betul yr husband apa ye?
tak pernah ingat.. org kasitau, ingat 5 minit, lps tu lupe balik hehe

Along said...

Azrin: tipulah!! I believe I'm teh first that came up with this idea. :P

Krissy: Great idea!! No way they can fire me after that. :D

JsDaughter: Thank you for stopping by. And're most welcome.

MG: Heheheh..actually I got no balls to write that stufflah. Afterwards become big Hoohaa...haiya..

Anonymous: His name is Rashid. But you can call him Taiko.

BTW, what's ur name?

(5 seconds later)

What was your name again?


5xmom said...

If you do that, make sure you blog it. Hahaha.

Joe said...

Just write those down. Who knows, it'll stand out from the rest, and the CEO will take you in as his advisor or something.

Dah sihat ka belum?

Rashid = Ayam, now Rashid = Taiko? What la..

Anonymous said...

lupe lak nak sign..
Anonymous was me,

asyik lupe sbb tak pernah dgr orang panggil dia dgn nama betul tu
except maybe his family :D

sexymama said...

Send it to the the newspaper lah. Then can get side income to buy the MPV you're obsessing about.

Try joining Mrs Universe instead? U dah kahwin, cannot qualoify for Mis Universe.